A Study in Studied Politeness

Dear Telstra,

The time has come for me to bring to you a most minuscule detail that may have previously escaped your attention. It is the level of customer service provided by your Midland Gate outlet.

I agreed with a member of your team there on 17 December 2014 that I should take immediate delivery of an iPad mini.

Sadly, there were no iPad minis in stock at that outlet at that time, and I was assured that there would be one available for my collection the following day.

I was next in that outlet on 28 December 2014, and I was informed that no such iPad mini could be found there, and that this matter would be investigated by the outlet on 29 December 2014, and that I would be kept informed.

Sadly, I have not been contacted by that outlet on this matter.

I rang the outlet on 30 December, and heard a recorded announcement asking me to ring back later. I did so twice more that day, and 16 times more on 2 January 2015.

Sadly, my phone calls were not answered on any of those 19 occasions.

I contacted Telstra (your reference SR 1-363901962198) on 2 January 2015, and was return contacted on 15 January 2015, advising me that an iPad mini was available and awaiting my collection at that store.

I went back to the store two days later (17 January 2015).

Sadly, I was advised that “It is not possible for me to give it to you.”.

I contacted Telstra (your reference SR 1-375856514820) on 17 January 2015, and received an e-mail response which included the words “A member of my team will be in touch within five business days”. Five business days have now elapsed.

Sadly, I have not been contacted by any member of your team.

I am relieved that my investment portfolio has no shares in Telstra.

Yours,
Philip David Hart

Update 4 February

I was contacted by Telstra on 28 January 2015, three business days late. I was advised that the iPad mini would be posted to me, and that I could expect to receive it on either 30 January or 2 February 2015.

Sadly, it is now 4 February 2015, and it has failed to arrive.

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